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Ask Jeeves

At dinner:

B – I don’t want to get married.

R – I think I’d like to get married.

B – If you get married, R, we can still live together.  You and me and your wife.

R – Okay, but she would be just my wife, right?

Mom – How do you know R’s wife wouldn’t mind living with you, B?

B – I can live with R and help him around the house.  I can be your butler, R!




License to Drive

R shows up in our bedroom in the morning.

R – Mom, I don’t have any clean underwear.

Mom – We need to buy you some more.  Can you get in the car and go to Walmart for some underwear?

R – Umm… I think I’m not old enough to drive a car.  I think you need to be like 15 or 16.  I don’t even know if I could get a license.

Dad – Well, can you ride your bike to Walmart, then?

R – Not without underwear!


Praying for time

A bedtime prayer.

R — … Thank you that we were able to go to church today and please make the time go by faster at the service next week.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.


Gender differences

R — Where did you get that book?

Mom — Someone gave it to me.

R — Who was it?

Mom — I don’t remember.

R — It was probably a girl.  (Pause)  Girls are usually nicer to to others than boys are.