R — Mom, how does your body use sugar to make energy?
Mom — That’s a science question that Daddy can answer best.
R — How come Dad is so much smarter than you?
Mom — I guess he just knows a lot of stuff.
R — Why?
Mom — I don’t know. I guess he just knows a lot more than I do, particularly when it comes to science.
R — Yeah. I think Daddy is the smartest man alive that I know!
B — Me, too! He knows everything!
The boys helped Oma decorate the house for Christmas.
Because an outfit isn’t complete without accessories, of course.
And two days later:
R drew the stages of his life. He is clearly a planner.
I attest that the kid is, indeed, good enough to eat.
I’m trying to break the bad news gently.
Mom — Boys, Daddy won’t be able to come see us at Christmas. It turns out the airline tickets are really expensive and we thought we should save the money instead. He would only be able to stay here for a week or so, and we’ll see him in January, anyway.
B — How many dollars is the ticket?
Mom — It’s about $1000.
B — One hundred dollars?!
Mom — No, one thousand.
B — Whoa! That’s a lot of money! How many dollars is that?
Mom — One thousand dollars, B.
B — So Dad’s gonna save that money for his new job, right?
Mom — Well, no. He is trying to get a new job so he can get more dollars.
B — Oh.
R — Anyway do you even have $1000?
B is doing homework when he runs out of lead in his pencil. He hands it to me and I put lead in it.
B — Wow! Thanks! Good thing we have moms!
The boys are in the shower.
Mom — R, let me smell your hair and see if you did a good job of scrubbing the stink out.
R — Did I do a good job?
Mom — Hmm… you did an okay job.
R — It’s because I’m a kid. Kids aren’t good at doing some stuff. (Pause) I did my best.
R has taken to having “lunchbox conversations” with me.
B is having a crying fit over a toy that I have taken away. We have been talking for 20 minutes or so, and, as it is bedtime, I try to end the conversation.
Mom — B, we are talking in circles. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.
B — But I want to give you more details.
Mom — What do you mean?
B — I want to give you some more details about my situation.
R is rooting through my purse.
R — Where did you get this?
Mom — Oma gave it to me.
R — You mean you can keep it forever?